Sunday, 28 August 2011

So Long And Thanks For All The Fish ......

In two days time my bubble bursts and I return to work full time. It has been a lovely existence over the past 15 months with my two boys. I’ve been getting to know Tom and enjoying Harry’s first year at school. It has also given me time to breathe, enjoy people around me and not have to deal with work which had slowly ground me down. Returning to work takes me away from all of this and brings this lovely time to an end. There is also another consequence of my return and that is in relation to my time on Twitter.

I joined Twitter in May 2009 under my real name. I only really used it to follow celebrities,@schofe, @stephenfry and the like. I had about 50 followers and tweeted a couple of times a day but I didn’t interact a great deal with anybody, I think I got a couple of replies from @schofe, nothing more and I couldn’t see the attraction with Twitter.

In October 2009 however I found out I was pregnant for a second time and apart from my husband and one close friend who lives the other side of the country I had no one to talk to. I needed to talk about how I was feeling, especially as I had a bleed and early scan at 6 weeks but as I couldn’t tell anyone I decided to set up a second twitter account, @apregnantpause. My first post announced my pregnancy and showed a picture of my positive pregnancy test.

I never really expected anyone to follow me but during the course of the past 23 months, Twitter has become my friend and I have made friends on Twitter. It has supported me and has kept me company especially during the many long evenings when my husband @MrDaddyFixit has been at work. As Twitter is very transient I always have someone to talk to. There have been the hardcore Twitter people who have been with me from the start, those who have come but now gone and those who have followed since I gave birth to Tom. My evenings could have been very lonely but they haven’t been. I have chatted whilst watching X Factor, Big Brother and other highbrow evening programming about everything, anything and nothing. 

I’ve tweeted my excitement, scan pictures, first baby movements and the size of my bump.

You’ve given me tips, advice and helped me through morning sickness, shared my Braxton Hicks, normally every Thursday (on one occasions in the pasta aisle of Morrisons), my waters braking, which I initially mistook for wetting myself, contractions, baby blues, colic, Tom’s milk allergy and feeding problems as well as Harry’s first day in Reception class at school.

Twitter has made my maternity leave a much more positive experience than it would otherwise have been. Since giving birth to Tom, I have been on a number of tweet-ups. I’ve met 22 people from Twitter to the astonishment and concern of my mother. The first person I met was @somethingblue_2 on the 27th September 2010 at a shopping outlet in Derbyshire. My mum didn’t want me to take Tom with me and I was told under no circumstances was I to leave @somethingblue_2 alone with Tom. I did leave Tom with this person I’d met on the internet whilst I went to the loo and I’m pleased to say that both were still there when I returned. Since then I have met @somethingblue_2 on a number of occasions and had the pleasure of sharing JW’s first birthday.

I’ve been to Tweet-ups in York, Manchester, Lincoln, Huddersfield, Leeds, Sheffield, Newcastle for coffee, lunch, soft play dates, park picnics, birthday parties and a fantastic pre birthday weekend of shopping and mojitos with @helen71, @seeyouatthebar and @loveitloveitlove.   

 Did I tell you that I met @seeyouatthebar after I stalked her and left an award winning pork pie boxed and wrapped at her Chambers reception? Anyway I digress I am hoping there will be more Tweet-ups in the future, including another evening of mojitos with the Newcastle trio plus some of the lovely southern twitter ladies once @nudieprincess gets her backside back to work and starts earning some money!Tom and I have had a fun and very busy maternity leave, a good job really seeing as my so-called work “friends” have only contacted me on three occasions in 15 months.

I have stayed anonymous throughout my time, even after I told friends and family I was pregnant. I know some people have joked about my identity but I remained in disguise simply because it’s quite liberating being able to talk freely, not worrying that I’m being judged, that someone has preconceived ideas about me or that they may know the people or places I’m talking about. It is quite cathartic. Also as I am a University Lecturer it means that none of my students can find me. Thank god! Even though I have met a number of people from Twitter, all of them have respected my anonymity for which I am grateful and for that I want to say a big thank you.

 Twitter has also helped and supported me through my recent weight loss. I never lost my baby weight after Harry and was carrying over a stone and a half extra and that’s even before I got pregnant with Tom. This combined with my Egg Custard Tart survey meant that by Easter I was at my heaviest at 12 stone 10lb, the top end of a size 16 and a BMI which had just moved from overweigh to obese. With my return to work four months away I was unhappy  with myself and wanted to do something. I have tried in the past to lose some weight but have never been successful and after a twitter conversation with the lovely @kateagreen which spurred me on, I got started using the myfitnesspal app. Over the past four months you’ve put up with my daily food log posts, weekly weigh-ins and have supported me every step of the way. After my weigh in this  week I have reached my target losing 38lb in total and have reached 10 stone. I know that I wouldn’t have managed it without the comments and support of people  on Twitter. Thank you so much for helping me, it really has been appreciated.


So there we are, back to reality. Twitter has been such a big and important part of my life over the past 23 months that I felt I owed an explanation. Don’t panic! I’m not closing my account or retiring completely but my life is changing and as such I have to make adjustments to accommodate everyone and everything. Contrary to popular belief, a few of us in the teaching profession do work long hours, not all but some of us. Prior to getting pregnant with Tom, I normally worked a 50 hour week (not a complaint, merely an observation) and I fully expect that things will go back to that level upon my return; this coupled with the Masters that I am STILL attempting to research and write, plus the increasing pressure from my University to write and publish articles in law journals means that something has to give and for a while that is going to have to be Twitter.  I will still tweet when I can, no doubt about my arse of a boss BUT my tweeting is going to decrease even more than it has done over the past couple of weeks and as a result it is going to be hard to keep up with everybody’s tweets and news. Hopefully this reduced service will only be for a short while so please don’t unfollow  just bear with me, however just for now so long and thanks for all the fish...



  1. I cannot tell you how pleased I am to have shared most of this journey with you - you were my 1st ever non-celebrity follow! I count myself very lucky to (a) have met you online & in real life (b) count you as a friend & (c) have busted your identity (one of my proudest Sherlock accomishments to date).
    I will, of course, miss tweeting with you on a regular basis, but I always think the definition of a true friendship is one that can be picked up where you left off, no matter how long ago that was so I look forward to catching up when we can.
    Very best of luck for your return to work lady - Twitter's loss is academia's gain & I hope that twat of a boss comes to realise it! ;)
    Love, Hxx

  2. What a lovely round up of a fantatsic time in your life. It has been a pleasure to follow you and even meet in person at the Leeds TweetUp. Following your weight loss has been very inspiring for me and hope to do the same. I can always rely on you for a frank and honest opinion which is a quality I love and respect in people generally.

    I'm now looking forward to tweets about your arse of a boss, even though they will be slightly fewer.

    Enjoy your time back at work. Enjoy drinking a brew while it's still warm, in peace without worrying about a small person knocking it over. It's always the small things that make the big things easier.

    Good luck with everything.


  3. A lovely post- I'm glad you have been able to share this very special phase of your life with Twitter. It has been great to meet you and hopefully will be able to again. Wishing you the very best of luck for your return to work. I hope it all goes really well x x

  4. What a fab post. I wish you had blogged a long time ago. It's going to be very different on twitter without you on there as much, but you won't be left out of the @ messages! ;)

    I hope work goes well and you're back in the swing of things ASAP. I also fully expect to be in that southern meet up!

    Good luck mrs pause!


  5. Fantastic round up as you embark on the next chapter, it's been an absolute pleasure to hang out with you in twitterville, I shall miss your masked loveliness in my stream but will be thrilled to see you when you pop up from time to time. This my friend is just another "pause" whenever you hit play again, as & when, it will be great to tweet ya! Next time you're headed this way, let's make a plan for a coffee in Alderley, yes? A very happy return to work honey!
    Claire xx

  6. Aw what a fantastic post! I have not been such a twitter holic of late but I have loved being part of your twitter chats and will truely miss your masked face on my screen, so dont be a stranger okay, and massive good luck wishes for the new job. Go get em tiger ;D xxxx

  7. Just to echo what others have said - fantastic post!

    I will certainly miss your tweets in my timeline as you have always been there with support/encouragement/straight-talking but I'm sure that you'll be popping in with us from time-to-time!

    I'm with Katie in that I hope to be included in the Southern tweet-up and finally discover the face behind the mask!

    Wishing you a smooth transition back into your working life and, staying with the Douglas Adams theme - DON'T PANIC!!!

    ladyofessex (Sezi)

    P.S. How cute is Harry in that photo? I heart him.....

  8. Yes young lady you did stalk me and leave me pie a matter of minutes before I arrived I'm chambers!! My clerks concluded that I was having an affair and still don't believe me that it was a mentalist off twitter!
    More importantly though, id like to say thankyou for putting up with my impromptu visits to your house for coffee and food! We haven't known each other long but I consider you a good friend (which is weird considering wendy ON THE INTERNET LIKE FREAKS!).
    I'd also like to say that I love you. And your gorgeous family x

    - seeyouatthebar x x x

  9. I have just happened upon your blog and this lovely post. I can relate to the workmates and lack of contact. I can also say that the kindness of strangers is really very amazing when lonely in my experience. I have met and have been supported by people on the net, and it truly is amazing. You really have summed up quite well, how people who havent met, can become so close. Looking forward to reading more.

  10. This is such a lovely post. You really are a lovely lady and even thoug we haven't met in the flesh you have always been there for advice with Roo's horrid phases and no matter how much stress you are under you always find time to check on other people.

    I wish you all the best for your return to work and hope they don't keep you from us for too long xxx